Tips for a healthy relationship
A healthy relationship:
- involves two people who feel good about themselves and each other
- is a friendship - not just a physical relationship
- accepts the need for privacy on both sides
- acknowledges that not all experiences and interests need to be shared
- allows for differences of opinion
- does not make unrealistic demands on either partner
- allows for equal sharing of power and control
- is basically calm - not frantic
- should be fun and enjoyable.
Know yourself
It is important to know yourself before you fall in love. Healthy relationships allow you time and space to maintain your own life and time to pursue you own interests, as well as enjoying the time you spend together.
Know your rights
Relationships are about mutual respect. In any relationship you have the right to expect to share equally in decision making. If the other person always makes decisions about where you will go and who you will spend time with then this could be an indicator of someone who likes to have power and control in a relationship.
You also have the right to:
- express your opinions and have them respected (even if your partner does not agree with you)
- take the relationship slow and only progress at your own pace
- have your feelings about any sexual activities respected and accepted
- have your physical and emotional needs regarded as important as your partner's
- not be physically, sexually, financially, verbally or emotionally abused.
Know the danger signs
You can tell if you are in an abusive relationship by keeping an eye out for these danger signs:
- control:
- when your partner wants to know everything you do and checks up on you
- when your partner will not allow you to make your own decisions
- when your partner threatens or forces you to do things against your will.
- jealousy and isolation:
- when your partner cuts you off from your friends or family
- when you may not do things that you would normally do because you are worried about how your partner will react
- when your partner causes trouble when you talk to other people
- when your partner displays a lack of respect towards you and makes you feel uncomfortable
- use or threat of violence and/or abuse to achieve a desired outcome for one person over the wishes of another.
Confidential support and advice for women affected by domestic violence is available by phoning dvconnect Womensline on 1800 811 811 (24 hours, 7 days a week).
Note: This number is not recorded on your phone bill.
